35 posts from 2008

Just a quick blog log..

• I want this North Face Thermal Jacket[size medium, in black or brown please. ;) .. only $179.99!]
  
  

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• My house looks so much better, and warmer with the tree, and stockings.. and all the lit candles. I think after we ditch the tree in a week, or so.. I'll get some sort of potted plant to put there- make the house feel warmer- or more comforting all year long!
• I made a list of everything to get done today since I'm home from work [and hopefully Brett actually can take both kids tonight--a day early, since I can not afford to miss another day of work, otherwise.. I can't pay rent.. and since I no longer will be getting Child Support, yk? So stressed. :( -sigh-]
• My list:
• Laundry got some of it done so far
• Vaccuum
• Dishes
• Fill out application
• Clean KK's room

• Clean OUR KK's room in prep for all her presents she's getting
• Clean shower in Me & Ben's room
• Clean out art closet
• Go through bills/paperwork/documents
• Figure out what to do with old coffee table moved it to X's room for now.
• Refresh linens
• Wrap presents/stocking stuff
• Clean pantry/fridge
• Send back Netflix movies
• Pay bills [or, write checks to send out tomorrow]

So, there ya go. I clean when I'm stressed out.. :(

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

So, the last 48 hours...

• Pills.. made me feel nauseous
• Liquid.. made me have one of the worst feeling nights ever
• Getting IV.. took 3 tries, and two nurses.
• Procedure.. piece of cake! Thanks sedation drugs!
• After procedure.. hungry, hungry after not eating for almost 48 hours!
• This evening.. headache, sick, exhaustion, cold.. like the flu almost -sigh-

So, that's that. They have two diagnosis they can make, but are doing 3 biopsies .. one diagnosis would be infection which could be treated. Second would be Ulcer "disorder".. which, there's no cure for.. and you're high risk for cancer.. and all you can do it "control" symptoms.. at least I have a couple answers now. It's just scary to me -sigh-.

On the upside. I took KK out in the snow this morning before all the older kids in the area got to the fresh beautiful snow. She had fun tromping all over the snow and trying to throw snowballs at me. Then, she realized snow is REALLY, REALLY COLD, and cried about her hands being so cold and how she wanted to go back inside. We ripped her snow pants and gloves off and put her little fingers in lukewarm water to warm them up. Then we lounged around until Kim came to pick her up for the day. KK seems to really enjoy lounging under comfy down blankets watching TV. She really misses her brother, and is always so sad when he isn't around. But, I know this is good for Xander... to be spending time with his father, he needs it- and enjoys it. KK probably is feeling pretty lonely the last couple days.. since I was prepping for my procedure yesterday, and all sickly today.. her & I haven't been able to spend much time together.. but, since I feel so gross [and the bad roads/my little car] I'm going to call out sick.. I already said I may be doing that anyways cause I may feel sick the day after-- so, her and I can hang out tomorrow.

Oh.. and Kim took the girls to Shari's to eat.. breakfast and shakes! haha.. they are just too cute. KK loves going out to eat too.. what a brave mama Kim is to take BOTH girls out by herself. Bravo Kimmi!

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

I'm really cranky today. It should just be a new day, but I went to bed angry and frustrated and woke up just as bad [in addition, a raging headache to boot]. Plus, I think Xander threw his Concerta away or something, and so I made him take an 18mg tab just in case because he wouldn't focus and was bouncing off the walls [yes, I highly medicate my kid.. get over it]. I really dislike feeling so angsty, but nothing is making me feel better. Ben left to do god knows what, and Xander is with Cindy are swim lessons.. so at least it's just me and KK watching "Horton Hears a Who", nice and warm in the house, and very silent and relaxing right now.

I bought a few Christmas presents yesterday and also figured out everything else [for the most part] that I'm getting people. I still have to decide what to get Ben for his birthday on the 27th though. I think I'll make him a yummy dinner and cupcakes.. and then buy him something little, and personal. We'll see. He isn't real into the whole birthday thing, meh.

I'm doing kind of.. mm "themes" per person for Christmas this year.. so KK and Reilly are getting "comfy bedtime theme" [robe, jammies, slippers.. and then got KK this REALLY warm blanket-robe, and getting her Horton Hears a Who -we just have it from Netflix right now- and popcorn, etc etc].. Xander is getting clothes & wii games [its all he wants].. I also go some O.P.I. AvoJuicie's from the spa that I'm giving to KK and my sister.. and gift cards, def gift cards. Cindy's getting herself a Keurig coffee maker, so I'll probably get her some of the K-Cups for it.

I'm hungry.. off to eat.

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

Im honestly horrible about actually BUYING music. But.. I bought the Spinnerette EP online today out of pure wonderful impression it had on me. Generally I have NOT liked Brody Dalle's voice in the past.. and when I'd seen her live YEARS ago, was completely unimpressed.. but, this is so my taste.. and I love it.
 

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

I'm determined to master the art of Cup Cakery. I'm seriously obsessed with cupcakes and making them right now.. especially after tasting Cupcake Royale's.. yumm! [see above photo]

Will try this recipe:

Ingredients

• 2 cups all purpose flour
• 1 1/2 cups sugar
• 3 teaspoons baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 4 egg whites from large eggs
• 1/2 cup shortening
• 1 cup 2% milk
• 2 large eggs
• 1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
 

Vanilla Cupcake Recipe Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Line cupcake pans with paper liners.

Combine flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, shortening, milk and vanilla  in a large mixing bowl.  Mix at low speed for 2 minutes.  Scrape bowl.  Add egg whites and mix at high speed until fluffy and smooth, approximately 2 minutes.

Fill liners 1/2 to 2/3 full of batter.  Do not overfill.  Bake 20 to 25 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean.

Cool 10 minutes in pans then remove from pan, and place on wire racks to cool completely.

Frost and decorate your vanilla cupcakes as desired.

and this for frosting:

• 1 1/2 pounds cream cheese, room temperature
• 1 pound butter, room temperature
• 2 pounds powdered sugar, sifted
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

1. I really wish Xander would quit loosing his clothes.. and if he does loose them, why can't they be the cheap one's from Target... not the $25+ shirts from Volcom?

2. I'm sort of a Netflix Nazi.. I realized the majority of the DVDs we have gotten are one's I want.. and I keep moving Ben's to the end of the list. That isn't very nice, is it?

3. KK knows how to play her cards right.. everyone at school has "different" adorable stories about her, and how they just LOVE her, and HOW did I end up with SUCH A GREAT DAUGHTER?! ...  aw geez, I can't imagine life without her.. and to top it off, she also fussed over missing her mama this afternoon. Yup, plays those card's just right.

4. Xander can be the sweetest, funniest little thing.. and was the best all evening. And brought it upon himself to apologize for last night's fiasco.. what a good boy.

5. Atheist sign at the Capitol = Good. We all have different beliefs.. why should just ONE be celebrated!

6. The Mexican repair guy didn't install my new dishwasher today. Arg.

7. I'm tired of getting migraines. I gave in and restarted taking Seasonale. The headaches should subside soon enough now.. In the same subject [kinda.].. I'm tired [haha] of not being able to go to bed at night, and I doubt popping Nyquil, Tylenol PM, etc nightly.. is healthy.

8. Already wishing it was the weekend. Four days to go.. Friday Happy Hour [ugh.].. at least my paycheck should be decent..  Plus, I'm taking the 17th-18th off. And then have Dec 25th- 28th off. Yes.. vacation time.

9. January = Newport Vacation. I'm making it happen, and am aiming at January 16th to leave.. found a sweet little hotel on the beach for decent price.. We need a vacation.

10. I'm afraid to put presents under my tree. I don't trust my kids.

11. Jordan can't come home for Christmas.. this is one of the very few times I have ever witnessed my mother this incredibly sad. It's heartbreaking all the way around.

12. KK has an appreciation for Christmas, for the first time in her life she somewhat understands it. Although, I had to explain just who Santa was the other day.. she now get's who that guy is... she will be very excited for NORAD this year!

13. Good choice on buying everyone in the house an advent calendar.. they were a hit.

14. Weight loss = not happening.. also = not caring right now, too many tasty things in December.

15. Kombucha.. although good for you, I find it hard to shell out $4 per drink, and cough that giant bottle of elixir down.

black friday death ... Susan is right in telling me "one more reason to hate walmart".. what. the. hell. is. wrong. with. americans?! Seriously, sales at wal-mart you know, are WAY more important then a human being's life.

THIS is why I didn't go shopping today. THIS is why I don't shop at Wal-Mart [I mean, look at the obvious majority of people- and their stature in society- pretty clear they are deadbeat's that will have bad karma for the rest of their lives.] and lastly, THIS is why I am a homebody.

So tragic, I feel for the family.

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

My thankful list for the last year..

Ben.. he has been there for me unconditionally, and was there when no one
else was. When I felt trapped and hopeless, he was still there and kept me
going. When he should have completely run the other way, and I was battling
what I needed, versus what I wanted.. he was still there, and fought for me.
He has helped me become a better person, a better friend, a better mother
and better lover. I have so much love and respect for him.. and I can
honestly say, after being with him for the last year and some odd months I
still look at him and feel completely in love, as I did when we first met..
only, now it's comfortable, loving.. exactly what it should be.

The kids.. We've had to struggle for the last few years. But things are
finally settled down so much, we are normal [normalish.]..

    ...Xander is finally getting help for everything he needs help
with, and is learning to overcome the unfairness we all experience in
society and daily life. He's such a strong kid for everything he has seen
and gone through, he's funny and talkative and completely loving and
emotional. His smile is infectious and although unorganized, he always knows
where his favorite things are.

    ...KK has been able to flourish as an individual, and has turned
into such a little firecracker, with such a silly personality. She is in
very many ways, such a female.. but loves to still hang out and get dirty.
She's 4, going on 14 most of the time... sweet, giving, sassy & a great
sense of humor. And, where ever it came from.. she stands up for herself,
and let's what she's feeling be known.

Friends.. the few left, the few who are still there. The one's who said
they understood why I gave up going out. The one's who understood dependancy
problems, and helped me through them. The one's who still called. The one's
who were okay with taking afternoons to hang out with coffee, over nights at
the bar. The one's who have watched my kids when I needed peace and quiet,
and sanity. The one's who listened to me cry, and laugh. Or drove me around
at 2am when I was upset... or drove me home when I had too many drinks. I
love the few of you.. and would do anything for you too.. anytime, anywhere.

My Family.. I don't know how they put up with me. But I love my family so
much, for helping me grow up.. for helping me with the kids, for helping me
financially when I needed it.. and embracing me, and letting me know I'd be
okay as a single mom. That I'd be okay with changes and choices I was
making.

Opportunities.. I have gotten to see and do things this last year with Ben
I highly value. Things, though not exotic, or far away.. things I cherish,
that other's may not. Laying in a comfortable, warm bed being held. Walking
on beaches. Swanky dinners & martini's. Cooking excursions. Unexpected bouts
in the Northwest and surpises when I'm down. A new job.. and divorce.
Knowing.. I will be okay, and things always turn out better.. even when
thigns seem low and saddening, they always get better..

New Beginnings.. that says it all. And I hope my new beginnings phase
continues into the next few months with a few things ;)

And Lastly.. being happy, finally. Being loved, finally.

xoxo
brooklyn. <3

The weekend was really good. Ben and I did SO much stuff, it's unbelievable!

Friday he wasn't feeling well and just wanted to sleep.. so i went out to dinner with Landi, and then came home and went to bed next to him.

Woke up Saturday to hugs and cuddles.. always nice. We got ready really quick and went to The Spar for breakfast.. decided to go to the Museum of Glass.. which was fun, so so beautiful,- there just isn't a whole lot to look at though, which was sort of frustrating, we were in and out of there in less then 40 minutes. Oh well.

After that we hit up the Metropolitan Market in the Proctor district [I love it up there!].. got a tasty Ham & Brie sandwich, and we each got a cupcake from Cupcake Royale [yum].

Decided after that we should go to the movies.. but the movie didn't start until 4:15pm.. so we went and got Starbucks in DuPont, and then wandered around Steilacoom's beachy area. Still wasn't time for the movie.. went and looked at furniture, found out that in the clearance warehouse of the furniture store in Lacey.. they have a giant stain glassed church door "for all to enjoy" from 1907.. Isn't that bizarre? Finally went to the movie.. saw "Role Models".. it was hilarious.

Afterward, went to dinner at Angel's.. had some tasty curry.. yum! Then we decided to grab a couple drinks at Swing. Then.. went to The Mark for a few more.. there was live music in the red room, which was pretty killer.. except for all the Greeners and BO mixed with Patchouli smell..ick. And why hippy girls feel the need to dance in EVERYONE'S way as if NO ONE ELSE is next to them while "feeling the music" is beyond me. All in all... great day though.

Sunday we ate at The Creperie downtown [tasty], hit up the Famer's Market, drove around and went to the bookstore. I love relaxing weekends with my boy.. !

I got everything to make all my Thanksgiving side dishes, and am pretty excited for it! Should be fun! Funny how much work goes into one single dinner though, isn't it?

xoxo
brooklyn. <3